New Sightings of "Transformers Guy": AKA He DOES Exist!... Unfortunately.

Ever since my post a couple of months back on Transformers Guy, my friends have been curious about his existence. After all, the way I described him could have been mistaken for Bigfoot himself. Well, looks-wise that is. And then, one by one, my friends began telling me of their own encounters with the "man" himself.

One friend encountered him for the first time near Safeway and knew exactly who he was the minute she saw him. I don't remember what she had told me about what he had been muttering on about, but all I remember was that she saw him and completely went the other direction, trying hard not to be noticed by him.

Another friend had told me of his experiences with him and had even said he had talked to him a couple of times. My friend's prognosis: he's definitely crazy. He had told my friend that he doesn't like going downtown because, and I quote, "he's afraid the gays will rape him." I really can't make this stuff up... I could, but it might not be as remotely funny as the truth. One day, according to the same friend, he once got on a bus and asked out loud: "Who wants to hug a fat, sweaty man?"

And then my flatmate saw him, getting on the L from West Portal just as my friend was going home from downtown. He knew who he was the minute he saw him as well, but his looks or words were not the things that he took offense to -- it was his odor. My flatmate said that he had smelled so bad, he almost got off the bus just to avoid this guy and get away from the smell. Luckily, Transformers Guy got off the bus before my friend got off the train way earlier than he should have. He was lucky enough to hear an exchange between Transformers Guy and an unfortunate lady which, as told by my friend, I can only remember as such:

Transformers Guy: If you were the only woman on Earth, would you kill yourself?

Woman: Yeah, anything to get away from you.

Even I had the fortunate opportunity to see him recently while on a late-night adventure to get tapioca/boba drinks... by the way... BB Tea on 20th Avenue and Noriega... new favorite boba place. Anyways, while in my friend's car, I saw the mythical creature talking to (or harassing?) some guy working on his car on 19th Avenue near Taraval. Two new people got to see him that night, and another friend and I exchanged our encounters with the beast.

I know I had posted in the past about Transformers Guy being a "harsh reminder" of what I could become if I don't watch myself. I was in a dark place then... I guess? Anyways, today, I think I can safely say that I would never ever ever ever EVER end up like Transformers Guy. Here's why:

• I have too much respect for the people around me to not bathe and start awkward conversations with complete strangers, especially calling women bitches for not bowing down to men. Seriously, this guy didn't bother me until the second or third time I bumped into him when he started verbally abusing the lady passengers on the bus and trying to get awkward-looking guys to awkwardly agree with him.
• I have too much sense. At first, I was going to say I have too much fashion sense because I would never wear a black metal band shirt three sizes too short for me along with dirty shorts and a greasy balding mohawk, but I also have the sense not to tattoo ANYTHING ON MY FACE!
• I have friends and family who will call me out on my shit. I also have friends and family who care about me enough to where I will never be in that position to end up like him. Man, I don't know what tick crawled up in my head to even let me think "Holy fuck, I could end up like him if I'm not careful," which I guess is good since it just makes me more self-aware about my physical and mental health, but I'm pretty confident now that thankfully, I would never turn out to be that.

I have gone on the Google and the YouTube for proof that other people have bumped into him and talk about him. Unless my search skills suck (and you would think with what I'm learning, I'd be a pro at that all ready) I haven't found anything. To that, I'm kind of disappointed in college kids/millennials/hipster San Franciscans/anyone who posts on MUNI Diaries to NOT blog or take pictures and videos of this guy. He's offended so many people with his words and stench that SOMEONE must have talked about him.

The only thing that MAY or may not be directly talking about this guy is this reddit post.

So I took it upon myself to (horribly) sketch a rendering of this mythical cave troll that has blessed the overworld with his presence. My friend says he needs more head and facial hair, but other than that, the picture has been approved by those who have met him.

Honestly, I don't know if I was able to grasp the wretchedness and despair of this guy, nor was I able to fully express his aura... mainly the smell. Seriously I should have drawn some squiggly lines. His head is definitely more pear-shaped than illustrated here. Plus, his under-the-shirt flab is more square like with rounded edges, like a huge, disgusting curtain of skin. That's gross, I apologize.

Now it may be wrong of me to make fun of a clearly deranged and sick man. (And homeless?) Obviously, he has some type of mental disorder or something. However, the way he goes around public, not giving a crap about personal hygiene, spouting out his beliefs on women and every other crazy wacko theory he's immediately thinking of at that moment, verbally berating people who look at him funny, and talking extremely loud so that people can hear him are grounds for immediately being mocked and ridiculed. He's obviously a shitstarter... a true troll in both traditional and modern definitions. Even if he can't help some of those traits (like possibly being homeless and smelling like shit), there is STILL no excuse for him to be a fucking asshole to most of the people he encounters.

So be warned out there, people who use the 28 and L, and those who are generally in the West Portal/Parkside area. If you see this guy, take a deep breath before he gets anywhere near you, and if you're too late... well... weather the storm... unless you don't take shit from anyone, in which case, knock this fucker out for me and everyone else... and then immediately wash your hands. And if you want to go the humane way... maybe lead him into the direction of a City social worker? Call the police? I don't know... go with your instincts... just don't let your nose lead the way.